Psssttttttt…is this thing on??

Wondering if anybody still reads this thing, outside of random Googlers. If you do, awesome, you guys/gals rule. It has been a busy year so far! A lot of things happening that are as exciting as they are scary. I haven’t updated here in a long time not because I didn’t want to and not because I didn’t have the time. In all honesty, I just don’t know what to say. Sometimes the best course of action is no action. Some of the consequences of my decisions won’t be known until a few years out, so I’d rather not comment on them. The things that are going well are doing exceptionally so. And the things that aren’t I’m not really that worried about.

School was one of those things that just kind of took a back burner in terms of priorities. I honestly don’t know if school was the right decision at this point. It has its pluses, it has its minuses, so who knows. What doesn’t? Ask me again in 5 years and I’d have a more solid answer for you. The only real regret I had with school was that I didn’t get to connect with my classmates as much as I would have liked. I lost touch with a bunch of them that I would have liked to see more. But thems the breaks. School was extremely fast paced, stressful for some, and money/finding a job and time was always a concern for many. As for me, my own priorities changed as well and going out constantly and being involved in extra curricular school activities started to wane on me. I much prefer things like solitude, taking on personal challenges, physicality, learning on my own and so that’s what I focused on and set my priorities to. It might have been a schizo move and I acknowledge that but I just have to keep it real to myself and so I apologize to my friends and the potential friendships that I didn’t make because of my actions. There really are fantastic people in my program.

I feel very creative, experimental, and stoic right now. It kind of feels like that feeling when you spend a long time on a really hard math problem and get the right answer. I’m just loving life right now and rolling with the punches. I remind myself that this is my one chance at life and so I am going to do it the way I am going to do it. This summer is going to be my best yet. This much I’m sure of.