Tag Archives: simplicity

Making Things Intolerably Inconvenient

Kissing a Cactus in Argentina

Humans are lazy creatures by nature. Its just the way it is. Laziness isn’t a bad thing, in fact I think it has many benefits including getting adequate rest, keeping things as simple as possible, doing only what’s important, etc. If we can just accept the fact that we are lazy by nature we can use it to our advantage. One of the ideas I’ve been playing around with lately is the idea of intolerable inconvenience. The basic premise is you make something so utterly inconvenient for you that your laziness kicks in and you decide not to do that something. This works great for getting rid of bad habits, saving money, sticking to a good eating lifestyle, and so on.

I first noticed this myself one fine morning when I realized I didn’t have any food in the kitchen but was starving. I was going to drive over to Tim Horton’s for a breakfast sandwich and coffee (bad habit) but realized I didn’t have a car for the day. “Oh, how inconvenient” I thought to myself. So what did I do? Nothing. I decided to fast that day instead (good habit). When I noticed that I did a good habit instead of a bad habit because I was too lazy to walk to the Tim Horton’s, I thought “hmmmm, what else can I make really inconvenient for myself to force good habits?”. Some of the stuff I came up with was removing a lot of bookmarks to time wasting websites so that if I wanted to go to them I would have to type them in manually. Too lazy, screw it. Another is hiding the remote control for the TV so that I don’t watch it. Get rid of the junk food in your house or put it in the attic or something. Lock your credit cards in a safe. You can get pretty creative with this if you use your imagination. Cell phone bill too high?  Give the phone to your neighbour.  Need to study more and play games less? Hide the power cord to your Wii.

Note that the opposite also works. Make good habits super convenient for you. Have a giant glass of water beside your bed so that when you wake up in the morning you can chug it down and hydrate right away. Put the vitamins and supplements you take right beside the glass of water. Put your keys in the same spot everyday so you’ll never lose them. Leave your lunch at the front door so you never forget it (or set a daily reminder that goes off before you head out the door reminding you to grab it from the fridge). The list goes on. Make the good stuff easy to do and the bad stuff really inconvenient. I like it, nice and simple and effective.

You Don’t Need More Tips

Self help is starting to make me vomit.  I went in DEEP into the self help industry for about 5 years.  Like I’m talking crazy stuff like chakra cleansing, transcendence of ego, emotional freedom tapping and so forth.  Really hippy yoga shizz.  To an extent, I’m still into it and probably always will be because I believe in carving out my best self.  I get what I need about a subject at the time I need it and move on.  I had a guy email me the other day asking me to submit my blog into his self help blog directory. Ignored.  I’m no self help guru, and I don’t claim to be.  What I write isn’t self help.  Its atypical.  I challenge conventional wisdom and common sense.  I take action and make mistakes.  Its my journey into awesomehood, and if you get something out of it then even better.

The thing with self help is, people write these lists, 10 things you need to do to be happy, 14 things to help you stop stressing, 45 ways to save a kitten, and they are all USELESS.  These people aren’t any better off than you are.  I bet I could get under their skin if I really wanted to 😉  The reason that I am so against reading these tips is it is an excuse for inaction.  Some people call it paralysis by analysis, I call it the one more thing syndrome.  One more book to read then I will be ready.  One more purchase then I will be complete.  One more piece of equipment then I can start.  One more piece of advice so I’m prepared.  All cleverly masked excuses.  I would prefer something called next syndrome.  What’s the next challenge, what’s the next obstacle to overcome, what’s the next mistake I’m going to learn from?  There’s just no way in hell you need 45 ways to stay positive, firstly because you aren’t going to remember them all, and secondly because it doesn’t matter.  You need one and only one.  You aren’t going to read a 5000 word blog post by Steve Pavlina about the “Law of Attraction” and then become complete.  Instead of reading that, go out and do something that will actually get you results.  There is NO fundamental difference between reading a blog post about “Moving past fear based emotions” and watching a youtube video of a guy farting in terms of actually defeating your fear of something.  Want to beat your fear? Then do the thing that terrifies you.

You need ONE tip to relieve stress. Breathe.  Want another one? Ok fine, but last one.  Stop doing that thing that stresses you. DONE. Moving on.  You need ONE tip to get in shape. Eat less. One more? Fine. Exercise. That’s it, not hard at all.  The best technique, the most efficient method, the smartest tool, you’ll find out eventually through trial and error and immersion into the subject once you start doing it, not usually before.  Too much advice is bad, too many choices is very bad.  Simplify, reduce, limit your choices, ignore everybody.  Nike had it right with their “Just Do It” slogan.  Really, just shut up and do it.

Trimming the fat… simplifying to the essentials and removing the weights.

I’m a collector by nature. I’d go to Wrestlemania, and keep my ticket and buy a tshirt and never look at them again. I’d mod my playstation, and burn every game on that console just for completion sake, never actually playing the game and only turning it on to see if it worked. I’d accumulate and accumulate all this stuff, without ever actually using any of it. Know what I’m saying? I’m sure you do, because I’m sure you probably do that as well. My parents are collectors and so is my brother, so maybe its hereditary. But I believe that the things you own end up owning you (thank you, Fight Club). So how do you protect that from happening? One way is to reduce the things you own! Sell them, donate them, recycle them or throw them away! Its all about decluttering and simplifying.

Trimming the fat isn’t just about cleaning out your possessions. Its about cleaning out your relationships as well. The ones that don’t serve you anymore, the ones that hurt you, the ones that breed negativity. I’m sure you have some in your life. I know I do. I used to be really close with this one girl. She was one of my best friends. We used to hang out virtually every week and she would always ask for my help or advice. Her best friend said to me that she had changed a lot, and largely because of me. I even hooked her up with her boyfriend. I told her to try out online dating and wrote her profile for her. Soon after she met her current boyfriend who loved the profile. She told her boyfriend of me and he didn’t approve. Slowly but surely we stopped hanging out. I figured, as long as she’s happy. Last week I saw her for the first time since October, during our meeting her boyfriend called and scolded her for hanging out with me, in which case she obliged. This isn’t acceptable to me. I would love to tell myself how its her loss yadda yadda, as that would serve my ego. But truth is, its my loss too. I miss our time together. It really stinks being put on the backburner, but its even worse when its because of weak reasons like a controlling, insecure boyfriend being more important than friendship. Why she accepts those terms with him, I do not know and it is none of my business. Likely, we’ll never be as close ever again (although an apology and a change of circumstances may help). Be completely honest here, though. For me, there is absolutely zero anger involved. I wish her all the best and hope for her continued happiness, but its not something I wish to be involved with under these terms. However, if I secretly harboured a crush for her and lusted for her, and was hurt and angry that she would choose him over me, then that is 100% my problem and probably requires no trimming, but rather a re-evaluation of my own issues. Some things you just have to trim as guided by your morals and boundaries. Remember, by your morals and boundaries. When your relationships have crossed those boundaries, decide if that is or isn’t acceptable. If its not, trim it. Save yourself the mental anguish of holding onto that mess.

Trimming the fat can be a very difficult thing to do. Whether its a possession or relationship, it can be hard because there is some degree of attachment to it. But you’ll feel a huge weight lifted off your shoulders. Possessions aren’t supposed to be stressful. If you have a car that keeps on failing you, decide if its really worth the headaches in maintaining it. Or a computer that keeps crashing, or that super duper all in one magic kitchen thingamabob that you thought you needed but never used, if you aren’t using it maybe you should just get rid of it. If you’ve never tried to trim the fat, it can be hard. You’ll find a lot of times you’ll convince yourself you need this or that thing “just in case” even though you haven’t used it in years. Trust me, if you haven’t worn that sweater in over a year, chances are high you won’t be wearing it at all. Just donate it, already. When it comes to trimming the fat, less is definitely more.

Kiss me. Lesson 3.

“keep it simple, silly me.” is what you should tell yourself in times that you forget.  remove clutter from your kitchen, from your bathroom and living areas.  remove clutter from your wardrobe, from your brain.  you will find that less is indeed more.  instead of multi tasking 10 things at once, let’s single task 1 thing with 100% focus.  by doing this, you will find more clarity in your life, your imagination will sparkle, and ultimately you will be happier.  with less things to juggle, it will be easier for you to balance.  remember that when the times get tough (and the times will get tough, they always do.)